What about the movie lounge? I like exciting films
Do you? Our hotel is located in the heart of Amsterdam's unusual movie district. Whether you want to watch a remake of Star Wars with more goats and chickens than the original, or star in a production of your own (bring your handcuffs, applesauce and battery operated vacuum cleaner) everything is possible here. Our hotel has a full range of studio facilities, a big darkroom, and of course, our deluxe video cockpits. Here you can choose from a very wide variety of sometimes slightly disturbing programs, 24 hours a day.

What about the holiday romance package?
That can be arranged. For an additional fee we will search local cafes and bars for an exotic drunken foreigner with the scent of garlic on his/her breath and an ass to die for. The following morning (or directly after the act if you prefer,) our fully qualified receptionists will burst into your room, dressed as ninja assassins to wake you up (so you do not miss your plane) and to chase away the greasy devil that, only hours before pleasured you so exquisitely with his skillful tongue and fingers.

Is Breakfast included?
Yes. From 8:00-10:00 am or till it runs out, so be early. Think of your fellow traveller and stop stuffing yourself like a maniac. Also it's not allowed to build lunchpackages for take out or for the Salvation Army.